Me and Little James

If you follow our discipleship path here on our website, you will find I am Chosen as one of our Engage checkpoints. Since January, our Community has been hosting a Chosen Watch Party in our basement as we walk through Season 3 of the series called The Chosen. If you have never heard of The Chosen, it is a multi-season, viewer supported, series depicting the life of Jesus and his Apostles and followers. If you haven’t seen it, I highly recommend it!!! If you are a fan of The Chosen and have not yet seen Season 3, I want to warn you now that there are spoilers coming up in this reflection.

We open our watch parties with a time of giving back to the Lord with our voices in praise and worship. We thank him for all he has done, and we invite him in to watch with us. We then break out the popcorn and nuts and watch an episode or two of The Chosen. Finally, we end with sharing a meal and have a discussion about what we had just watched. It is always beautiful to hear about which scene had the most impact on a particular person. Sometimes it can be the same scene, but it hits multiple hearts in very different ways.

At the end of our March Chosen Watch Party, Sr. Anna asked the question:

Which Apostle in The Chosen do you most relate with and why? 

For me, it has been the character portraying Little James (as he is nicknamed in the show, aka St. James the Lesser) played by Jordan Walker Ross. There is very little known about Little James in the Bible, but the way he has been brought to life speaks to my heart and encourages me to keep pushing forward and to persevere. Until Season 3, Little James did not play a big role, but more of a supporting role in the show. He is quiet, easily loved, and is there to help everyone. He has a huge heart and follows where he is called to go.

There have been two episodes in Season 3 that I most relate to the character of Little James. First, in episode 2 titled “Two by Two,” Little James approaches Jesus about the mission of the apostles being sent out in pairs to “heal the sick and the lame by anointing them with oil and casting out demons.” You see, he could not fathom the notion that he would have the power to do such things when he himself walks with a limp. The part of the scene that hit home for me is:

James: The others are so much more…

Jesus: So much more what? 

James: I don’t know…stronger…better at this? 

Jesus: James, I love you, but I don’t want to hear that ever again!  

Every time I watch this scene, my heart gets a little bit softer towards myself. I guess you could say that my “limp” for many years has been the not so good habit of comparing myself to others. Just as with Little James, I have viewed everyone as “more” than me. Stronger. Smarter. Better. However, that last line by Jesus has little by little been changing my heart. When these lies creep in and I begin to put myself down, I try to close my eyes, and hear Jesus say to me:

 “Sr. Alison, I love you, but I don’t want to hear that ever again!” 

I will admit, it is not always easy to hear. I can even catch myself arguing back with him saying, “But Jesus….” Needless to say, his truth wins in the end, and I repent for falling once again.  This habit is definitely one I am working on breaking. As with any change, I need to be patient with myself, as change doesn’t happen overnight. I desire instead to grow in humility. One step I am taking is to recite the Litany of Humility each day, as it is a daily reminder of the person I aspire to be, and the kind of person God is calling me to be.

Secondly, in  episode 4 of The Chosen, titled “Clean,” we see Little James praying for the leg of a young man and the man experiencing healing. James begins to cry as he too is touched by the Lord actually working through him. From then on, his confidence begins to grow. I again can relate to Little James, and I have experienced these feelings as I too am surprised when the Lord works through me when I am praying for someone. For example, in December I was on a prayer team at the annual Encounter Conference in Michigan. My partner Curtis and I had a woman approach us during the time of healing prayer stating that since contracting Covid a few months prior, the bottom half of her leg was constantly cold. She couldn’t do anything to warm it up. As my partner and I were praying, I sensed I needed to place my hand on her leg, so I asked her if I could do so as I prayed for healing and warmth to come. She said once I touched her, she could feel warmth in my hand and the cold sensation left her completely. We all thanked Jesus for the healing she experienced. This not only built up her faith, but mine as well. It is awesome whenever we can partner with Jesus!

The same thing has happened with prophetic prayer. When I share prophetic words, even though I find them to be simple, many times the person receiving shares that it is spot on and really touches their heart. With practice, I have become more comfortable approaching people and having conversations and sharing the Lord’s word with them. It is exciting to see what the Lord is doing in my life. He only asks for me to make myself available to him, and he does the rest.

How has God been working in your life? Is there an apostle that you can relate to?

If you live in the Ottawa area, would you be interested in joining us for our next I am Chosen watched party? Please check the Engage tab on our website for more information and to register so we know that you are coming. We will save a spot for you. Remember, Jesus loves you!!!