“You cannot be half a saint. You must be a whole saint or no saint at all.” It was these inspiring words from St. Therese of Lisieux that sent me on a wildly unexpected adventure. I was seventeen when I first encountered the possibility of religious life. Surprisingly, it was by seeing videos of the Servants of the Cross Sisters online. I was captivated by their love and boldness for Jesus! However, I had two teensy obstacles: I wasn’t Catholic, and I was scared at the thought of joining an active order.
It was the intense, magnetic pull of Jesus and a contemplative religious Community that charted my course to Catholicism. I had loved the Lord my whole life, but it felt like I was being plunged deeper into his love. Over the next three years, I was drawn into the fullness of the faith and was officially received into the Catholic Church in 2023. I was wisely advised to wait one year before truly discerning religious life. In the fall of 2024, I was given the green light from my spiritual accompanier to begin.
I gave God one year to speak to me about this vocation. I figured I would have at least a couple of years before making any big decisions. It turned out, however, that God wasn’t interested in delaying for very long. I was told around this time by a wise nun that she sensed the Holy Spirit couldn’t wait any longer for me to begin what He had in store for me. Looking back, I can’t help but think she was right.
Restless from dissatisfaction with the world, and joyfully burdened by a longing need to console Jesus’ heart by sharing his love with others, I reached out to the Servants before Christmas.
Within ten minutes of their winter Come and See, I knew that a life of evangelization was calling me, and I couldn’t send it to spiritual voicemail any longer.
During my discernment week, as I sat before Jesus in Adoration, I clearly remember him asking me if I would join him as his Servant. Earnestly and without hesitation, I gave the biggest “YES” of my life! In John 10:10, Jesus tells us that he came so that we may have life and have it abundantly. It breaks my heart to see so many people knowing of Jesus, but not knowing Him personally. I am ecstatic to have the opportunity to discern sharing my beloved’s abundant love with the world through the apostolate of evangelization!
